I’m thinking here of at least three very precious children, all of whom are now traumatised by a system that quite clearly is not designed for them, which apparently can only support them if they ‘tow the line’ which they can’t do because their needs are so great.
They are beautiful children, intelligent children who have massive anxiety issues, and problems with social context.
One child, only in year one has already been given a label as being ‘the naughty boy’ because he needs to feel safe and secure before he goes in to school. He is not a naughty boy. He works very hard to be a good boy and to please people. He has major anxiety issues, and needs to work in a calm and ordered environment where everything is predictable. When he can’t find that security, that calm and ordered environment, his anxiety increases dramatically, fear of failure and of getting everything wrong becomes so ‘present’ that he has a meltdown. He cries, he tries not to go in to a situation that is intolerable and he vents his feelings on his distraught mother who is forcing him (his perception) to go to this place.
Many parents have been there. I’ve been there. You don’t need to be told just how awful and helpless you feel taking your child in to school.
Order and calmness with predictability is not that hard to provide a child, giving transition warnings to help move to the next part of the day or lesson is not rocket science. Yet again and again there seems to be a failure to manage such simple things.
It makes me despair. We will lose children to the fringes who have the potential to be our out of the box thinkers, merely because we can’t adapt to their needs without the issue of funding, training, and actually just plain common sense.